WALKING CONTRADICT

if only life can rewind.

Tue, 05 Jan 2010 13:21:38 GMT

Why people only cherish things only when they have lost it? Sadly to say, I'm one of them.

I wasn't in any mood for class today, but thankfully it was rather easy so I had no problems with that. Was talking to KC and he was saying how wonderful life in London is for him. If I had the chance and the money, I'd do the same thing. Hell, I'd even go to the States to study and never return. He was saying that he would bring his gf/wife to stay in UK where it's less stressful. So I asked if he has a place for me to apply. HAHAHA. Just kidding. Been going through the damn Top Universities 2009 list for the whole afternoon and realised it was a dream I could never achieve at this current moment.

6 weeks of hell starts yesterday, I almost died at the UT but thankfully I think I did okay. (Pray hard for me please.) I have got a report to be done over the weekends and to be sent for checking. Sucks right? I know. Anyway, might be going to timbre with the boys on Friday after class and UT. I'm going to drown my liver, literally.

It seemed to me that people started their year well. I, on the other hand, didn't start it as good as I had expected. Should seriously start planning my time wisely. And okayyy I know I'm late when it comes to planning.

Did I mention that sometimes I hate people telling me "don't worry it's going to be okay"? Cause deep down you know it's never going to be okay and you're just lying to yourself. Seems like this form of lying isn't that bad because it gives you a sense of assurance. Instead, I wish you people would just walk this ugly phase of life with me and encourage me in any possible way you could.

Should seriously start buying clothes for CNY like nowwww. I saw some dresses on F21 and VS that I really wantttt! :) Gonna ask my sis if she wants and we can order together. Oh yes, of course, heels shoppinggggg, S!

two zero one zero

Fri, 01 Jan 2010 07:27:11 GMT

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2010!

I figured that I should probably do a journal update before people thinks I'm dead or something. Anyway, I'm still alive, hadn't been appearing much online (as noted by Sherm) because I didn't feel like it. LOL. Been getting enough rest for this holiday before I officially start war in school for 6 weeks. My goodness, 8 UTs in 6 weeks. That can kill one person. On top of that, there's still FYP report, presentation, poster to be done. I hadn't done a single thing. What a great start for the year, indeed.

Oh yes, my laptop ran into some problem and right now it is in the "hospital" and thankfully, the guy who was at the counter the other day said he could get it done asap. Please be well soon, baby. Oh, I meant my laptop.

There's a facebook group that says "I hate it when people make plans, get excited, but it didn't happen" right? Or something along that line. I find it absolutely true. LOL. I should probably go become a fan of that line. :)

I finally had my new year resolutions done. It's a secret and I may have accidentally let Jinhua knew a few of them. Since I was able to guess his resolutions too. LOL. And the first on the list is to be happy, not just for the year, but forever. I guess that's the most important thing to me this year. I hope it's the same for all of you too.

To be on a random note: I think I hate my current nail colour but I'm lazy to change.

It's the first day of 2010, but why am I not feeling a thing? It just feels like another day to me. Nothing special actually. It's not as if all your sins, mistakes, regrets, unhappiness would TOTALLY be erased.

Dinner with the family later! I hope my drinking buds can make it for the gathering tonight.

Tue, 29 Dec 2009 15:41:28 GMT

I realised that I hadn't been blogging. But I've got no idea what to put in here.

Jan 2010 is going to be busy with FYP, and UTs. I expect myself to be a bit cranky then so please be patient with me. Like what others had been putting in their facebook status, May 2010 be a good one. Oh yes, I gotta write up my resume before school reopen. That's a lot of things to do for a week. I've got no one to blame cause I've been putting it off.

Chao outside. I ran out of words and I'm abit lazy to type. Happy new year everyone! Have an awesome 2010 ahead!

what a timely reminder

Mon, 21 Dec 2009 17:00:53 GMT

I've never been the kind to ever let my feelings show
And I've thought that bein' strong meant never losin' your self control
But I'm just drunk enough to let go of my pain
To hell with my pride let it fall like rain
From my eyes
Tonight I wanna cry

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DICKSON!

Mon, 21 Dec 2009 12:11:51 GMT

Had a grand surprise to be put into action yesterday. L S Chua's birthday.

Met the boys at town at around 3-ish to get Dickson's birthday present. Porter's pouch. We were deciding between a wallet and a pouch though. Then went to somerset to meet him first. Of course, I'm always the punctual one, so I meet him first. Hahaha. Then Ron, Hua and Boon met us a few minutes later, like appearing one by one. Part 1 of fooling him done.

Head off to Suntec and Ron play stunt and surprised us. LOL. Dinner at MOF and Dickson's jealous that they all have their phone ringing and he doesn't have. Truth is: I am messaging them with updates of the cake and all. LOL. So I texted Dickson since he was jealous, so did the rest. HAHAHA. Hua and Boon diverted his attention and brought him somewhere. Ron said he was going to meet the girl, and I said I had a stomachache and will be in the toilet for a long time. (It was partially true cos I had tummy ache the whole day.) Part 2 of fooling done!

Sherm got the swensen's strawberry's cake since strawberry is his favourite. We hid somewhere, got the cake ready and I brought him to where Ron and Sherm were at. Cause they were holding the cake and hiding. Part 3 of fooling succeed! Of course, he was surprised with the cake and the present. The Taeyeon's card as well. (Effort leh, I tell him I wanted Edward's face for my birthday.)

Head off for some beer and got home at around 12-ish.

A 2009 like this. :)

Fri, 18 Dec 2009 14:01:06 GMT

It has been a fruitful year. I've grown to be more mature and responsible. Time pass so fast this year. I'd say that it has been a good year, minus some unhappy events of course. Met new people, started out a new life. Well, I'm thankful for the Japan and Batam trip. It has been nothing but relaxing. It's good to take a short break before all the nonsense. I hope for a Hongkong trip soon. The boys had been suggesting it. Okay, earn money first.

To die for.

I'm thankful for the most awesome mates.

Weiwei, Xuanwen and Sherina, my favourite bitches even though two out of three is in Aussie now. They had made my first half of 2009 wonderful. Enjoy your days in Aussie. If I strike 4D next year, I'd go there and visit you! Sherina, yes, you woman. Thank you for being there when I needed you.

Phyllis, Choon, JP, Caroli and Weizheng and Hock. My best mates since primary school. Thank you all. We should hang out in Choon's van soon! Have a crazy night out again, to ... CHANGI VILLAGE! :) That was the best experience, minus Choon's crazy driving.

The gossip boys (Jinhua, Boon, Dickson, Sherman, Ronald, Victor). Thanks for making school so much more bearable. I swear they were like the channel that receives my non-stop kp and complains. Hahaha. The food expeditions in the middle of the nights, the late night movies, KTV session and chalet. For all the laughter and joy you guys had brought to me. By the way, I still own all of you when it comes to alcohol. YAY!

Roy, the only man bitch I love and hate. Thanks for all the teasing you've done to me over MSN. I hate you for that. Hahahaha. Hope you had a blasting year ahead, with Sophie. Josh. The indian magnet! Hahahaha. (Seriously, I LOL when I typed indian magnet.) And of course, my wonderful family.

Mon, 14 Dec 2009 15:35:28 GMT

What is past is prologue. - William Shakespeare

Sun, 13 Dec 2009 08:35:20 GMT

Friday was nothing but a shitass day in the afternoon. AFS was the most interesting lesson with the most boring facilitator. Shh. Dick, Hua, Ron and Boon left classes early cause they couldn't tahan their super niaming faci and guess what? They went to play L4D 2. Damn. Went to interchange with Josh and I kinda felt bad for making him wait for me.

Anyway, head home and did some of my stuffs. Oh holy crap, I hadn't done my weekly log. Watched The Storm Warriors 2 at 12.10am at Cineleisure. I thought it would involve a lot of fighting, but it's not. There's like too much computer effects and there's this part that look kinda like Avatar. LOLOL. Movie ended at 2.30 I think and it's time for road trippp.

The cafe we wanted to go closes at 4, so that's out. Went to the airport instead. Walked around, and the boys just kept saying 'Si Orh Lang.' Tsk. Had Macs and I should have waited till 4 so I could have the breakfast. ARGH. Got home at around 5.30am.

Saturday was as mundane as ever, so is Sunday. Okay goodbye folks. :)

Hope Weiwei will have a good placement at Ayer Rocks. Don't play too much rocks and turn into one yourself. LOL. Kidding. The next time I'd see her is in June. That's long. :( Have fun working, and take care of yourself. (Yes to 6 months free of blood vomitting session.) She knew what this meant.

i was blind, such a fool.

Thu, 10 Dec 2009 13:50:02 GMT

Sorry for not blogging. I just got busy recently. Fact is, I don't know what I'm busy with.

Monday - school, maintenance practices. Nothing much, just a lot of metals and alloys.
Tuesday - Singapore flyer with the family. Sissy and I had a good laugh at Mom. Met Godmom after it and we went shopping!
Wednesday - boring FYP day. Had sakae lunch buffet with the boys. Each table roughly ate like 50 plates of sushi and there were 10 of us. So.. 150 plates maybe?
Thursday - Electrical systems. Very tired I tell you. Faci damn naggy. Had some time with the boys at causeway point after class. Talked and bitched. JH has a new name called Jack/Blue/Porn. LOL.

Auto flight tomorrow. Sian. Anyway, I'm going to watch Feng Yun tomorrow at 12am. Yes you saw it right, 12am. I don't know how am I gonna keep my eyes open. Goodnight for now. :)

Sun, 06 Dec 2009 07:53:31 GMT

This was on livejournal's writer's block question.

If the world were going to end on December 21, 2012, how would you spend the last of your days on earth and why?

So this meant that I've wasted my whole life studying so that I could get a decent job next time la? I would spend my last days on earth partying and travelling around the world, hopefully to die in some other country like err.. JAPAN :D

And btw, I am so pissed at my AFS faci. FUCKKKK.

Okay, I consider switching to tumblr, but this mean that I couldn't be on livejournal sprees anymore. So... no. I don't wanna change.

Sat, 05 Dec 2009 15:05:00 GMT

We're living a life that's going at 200mph.

the battle that never ends.

Mon, 30 Nov 2009 12:58:01 GMT

I remembered telling Weiwei on MSN that it's going to be December tomorrow. 31 days till the end of 2009.

So in another 4 more months I'll be joining the club 2. Age is just a number but it is the responsibility I'll have to face in life. Yes, you can tell me people in other countries might be married and already parenting at the age of 20. But hello? We're in Singapore. So save it.

I was reading the papers earlier. There was one news that caught my attention and I seriously would like to express my thoughts about it. This girl, she's 17 I guess (not really stated in the papers), was raped by her dad for the past 6 years. She endured it silently. She was forced to watch her parents had sex (nbcb) when she was 11 years old. How could someone like that not be traumatised? And what's more ironic, her dad actually got this China woman to sit with them over some birthday celebrations, claiming to be one of his women. Fuck. Where the hell is justice? And the wife just don't bother? Are you even a woman? If yes, then you're one big fucking disgrace to Women. Help me understand. Is the society too open-minded that your sexual life should implicate your flesh and blood?

I'm mad when I was reading it. I mean, I'd put the husband on the road and let 100 trucks run over him and then pour acid/salt on his fucking dick. Such bastards don't even deserve to live. It just made me realise that people nowadays can be so ... sexual orientated. Everything they do, they think of sex, be it she's your daughter or not.

How? How to trust that you and your husband won't turn into like that in the future? I know for one thing I won't. If my husband were to rape my daughter, I'd fucking torture him till he die. Hell, I'd even use Manchuria 10 types of torture on him. Irritating pest.

Okay, end of my daily ramblings. Time for mask.

cause you're hot and you're cold.

Mon, 30 Nov 2009 07:52:54 GMT

I had some overdued pictures hanging around in my laptop.

My mermaid-seeking friend.

Can't remember when this happens, but well, it was appreciated. I even had my new desktop display picture.

This is exactly the type of man I'm looking for.

Hi, be mine please? (kidding)

I have a feeling that I'm going to fall sick soon. Been feeling hot and cold. Yes, if you sing Katy Perry on me, I'll go crazy. Roy said 'forget and don't try too hard.' I had to agree with this. He also said that he's sick of Robert Pattinson already, that's because Sophie made him watch twice. She said if I'm there, probably she'd watch it 5 times with me. Hahaha, not that I mind. :)

I have a new goal in life. Which is to go on overseas trip every year. So I gotta start saving, though it never really happened. LOL. We'll see. I'm so tired. Gonna finish up whatever I can today and sleep early. Yes, Monday is mask-night. Apply mask first. Okay, bye lovelies. XOXO.

batam pictures.

Sun, 29 Nov 2009 16:09:41 GMT

As promised, these are some of the pictures I had for my Batam trip. I think we're having another trip in next year. Either Bangkok or Cameron Highland. Cameron highland can bring Luke, but BKK can't. Depending on the organiser also.

1. Jie and me.
2. Louis the F2 Racer. Hahaha!

1. While waiting for the racer to finish his race.
2. Us at the guan yin statue.

1. The very commercialised picture. Hahaha!
2. The nice resort house in front of the guan yin statue.

1. My room mates. The ones who didn't sleep much.
2. Foot reflexology. The poor guy was kicked by me at one instant.

BATAM!

Sat, 28 Nov 2009 15:04:21 GMT

Hi all, I'm back from the second-wife island.

Went to Batam for 2D1N with Mr. and Mrs. Chong, Mr. and Mrs. Tay, Elaine and Wende. Had the most interesting tour guide ever. Hahahaha. He's damn funny lor. Didn't spend much there, except for 1 thing. Hahaha. That's a secret. Shhh.

Like I said on facebook, I don't remember much about the trip. But well, Eileen kept making us drink beer. *burps* Hahaha I had one this morning, at 11am. Adopting the western culture ain't a bad thing actually. Hahahaha. Bought Kueh Lapis for the boys cause I know food is their thing. Eh, not cheap hor. Anyway, after we got back to Sg, we had dinner at Sakae Habourfront. Ate with Mr. and Mrs. Tay, also known as my new 'godparents'. Hahaha, we had a couple of best jokes during the trip la.

I'm damn tired now. I didn't sleep for err.. 2 days? Oh crap seriously. I should probably sleep early tonight. Yes. Goodnight folks. Pictures will be uploaded when I got it. Hahaha.

ANTICIPATION

Thu, 26 Nov 2009 05:43:11 GMT

Life don't seemed that sad anymore. I've got things to look forward to!

Today - I'll be seeing my love in the movies with Phy!
Tomorrow - I'll be away from Singapore. This trip is probably one of the highly anticipated event of the month.

NEXT YEAR MARCH!
Other than randomjuan's birthday at the macdonalds (haha i might have one there) or I'll be away from Sg again to celebrate it. That's if my buddies want to go on my birthday. No, other than that, it was graduation from RP and I'll be out working. Earning moolahs for my Hongkong, Japan and US trip, right Woo Weiwei?

Anyway, the other thing to look forward to in March was .. drum rolls ... REMEMBER ME THE MOVIE. Hehehehehe! Yes, my love is acting in the movie. And I've watched the trailer for like 4 times today. Man he's hot and absolutely adorableeeee. Please friends, watch the trailer. Hehehe. I hope it'd show in Singapore. That'd be the best damn thing that happens.

So damn hot right! I know. Hehehehe. Can't wait to see him in the movies laterrrr. Yes, I'm catching New Moon on Sneak preview. Aiyo he just made my day better even though my dad spoiled my wonderful morning.

Seeeeee my Edward. So damn bloody hot, tsk! Everytime I watched the Volturi slam my baby on the granite, I'd want to kill them all. Stupid idiots. How can like that slam my Edward all around! And yes, I would tell you Jacob is cute too. Hahaha. Go watch the movies! It's out in Singapore on 3rd Dec! Since well, my boys aren't willing to watch with me, I gotta catch it with Phy right. :( Though I wouldn't mind watching it a few times in the cinemas. Hehehehe!

Aiyo I don't know why am I so hyper today. Hahaha. It's good though. I hope there's road trip tonight. :( I wanna eat PRATA! Okay bye. Time for lunch.

cause it was you and me against the world.

Tue, 24 Nov 2009 08:20:38 GMT

It only takes this much to start hating.
And you are always somewhere between love and hate.

Maybe I shouldn't have that much expectation in you as well as in myself.
I could hardly trust myself, let alone you.
So ...

can't you see me standing right here?

Sat, 21 Nov 2009 13:45:33 GMT

In the rain, I'm calling you dear.

I apologise if my entries got shorter recently. But I've been experiencing writer's block and I have not much things to complain since I've been leading a rather mundane life. Everyday was - wake up, shower, go school, back home, shower and do rj/watch csi. Well, at least I have one to be happy about, which is my next UT will be on 4th Jan.

The weather seemed to speak my mood. It has been raining everyday. Probably ain't going school next Thursday so that I can have a longggg weekend. Hadn't decide what to do yet, but probably I should leave it and sleep at home the whole day.

There was a question that had been bothering me all week. Had I been a bad friend? I came to a conclusion that I shut people off and I may have been harsh to them all the while. So let's face this, this is what I am and according to my friends, they kinda find it alright with all my sarcasm. It's either you are too vulnerable, or you have no sense of humour. I think it's the both combined. I have no such problems with my friends and they kinda find it entertaining as well. (My classmate commented that I've got a sharp tongue which I gladly accept.) It beats better than being a damn bimbo, right?

Can I be random for a while and say that I am craving for roti prata? I hope the next food expedition is going for PRATAS! :)

Oh yes, I should visit a doctor next Thursday. I think I may have something wrong with me. :/

ripped.

Wed, 18 Nov 2009 14:15:13 GMT

I dreamed I was missing
You were so scared
But no one would listen
Cause no one else cared

After my dreaming
I woke with this fear
What am I leaving
When I'm done here

So if you're asking me
I want you to know

[Chorus]
When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

And don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest
[End Chorus]

Don't be afraid
I've taken my beating
I've shared what I made

I'm strong on the surface
Not all the way through
I've never been perfect
But neither have you

So if you're asking me
I want you to know

[Chorus]
When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

Don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest
[End Chorus]

Forgetting
All the hurt inside
You've learned to hide so well

Pretending
Someone else can come and save me from myself
I can't be who you are

[Chorus]
When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

Don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest

Forgetting
All the hurt inside
You've learned to hide so well

Pretending
Someone else can come and save me from myself
I can't be who you are
I can't be who you are.

Have we been so busy in life that sometimes we forgot to take a step back and breathe?
I guess so.

Sat, 14 Nov 2009 13:04:02 GMT

I DON'T WANNA CARE ANYMORE!

if i set you go, will you come back to me?

Thu, 12 Nov 2009 14:23:28 GMT

Two UT is down, but I'm feeling as though I've done 20 of them.

Been cranky lately. Not enough sleep and my body is resisting whatever I'm giving. I did try to sleep early okay, just that in the middle of the night I'd wake up and just stare at my starry ceiling. Totally opposing my daily 8 hours of sleep need.

Roy, Jiayi, Harry and I talked on MSN yesterday night. We're talking about how much our lives changed over the year. Well, with Roy not in Sg and Jiayi going over to Melbourne to study next year, our lives really are going to change. :( Thankfully, Harry's still here. HAHAHA.

When is my turn to get out of Sg and never come back?

Okay, I'm heading to bed and I'll be sure to enjoy my long weekend. Cause ... I'm skipping class tomorrow. It's BLINK BLINK! And maybe I'll go out in the night with Choon for some nice tequila loving.

Tue, 10 Nov 2009 07:05:39 GMT

My faci is very funny. He gave an analogy on something.

Why the rotor follows the magnetic flux?
It is like Mary had a little lamb, the lamb follows Mary right?

let's play a love game.

Sun, 08 Nov 2009 12:54:11 GMT

I should stop watching TVD and CSI for a moment and do the damn report. I know I've been saying this for days but nothing gets into my head. I have no idea what to ~~motherfucking~~ write.

I slept late last night, at around 5 I guess? Anyway, was talking with the boys. Just the usual roadtrip gang and we were well, wishing Dickson luck with his old flame.

I miss my bangs and most importantly, I miss Woo Weiwei.

all in due time

Sat, 07 Nov 2009 12:50:49 GMT

I know it's pathetic typing away on my laptop for a nice Saturday like that. But what choices have I got? I've got things due next week. KILL.ME.NOW.

Talked to several people yesterday. Made me realise at times we need reminders and I was just giving mine to S yesterday.

I should quit being so depressed about my life. I don't know what I'm depressed about anyway. I'm probably the happiest from Monday till Friday, minus some class issues. Let's just get poly life over and done with.

Did I mention that Roy and I had this new found addiction. HAHAHA. We liked going on omegle and conning people. Not on money. Just... Well, toy around with them. I know this is bad, but it's funny. Roy had this fella who said 'Hi, interested in seeing naked guy?' I totally LOL at my laptop when he pasted that convo to me. He replied 'I'm a guy myself!' LOL. People are just so ... sex orientated nowadays. Tsk! He had another which told him she was naked and he just 'oh really? i'd love to see it but .. goodbye.' and he ended that. LOLOLOL. I have a couple of funny experience. But other than that, don't be stupid and go give your msn and such. I prefer to just, toy around with them and hit 'disconnect'. LOLOL. Don't say that I'm a bastard (even though I know I am). It's just that I'm finding things to kill time.

Alright, back to report. It suck ttm (to the max) - for Jinhua's reference.

bring me out of this crazy life.

Fri, 06 Nov 2009 15:05:28 GMT

Sorry for not updating. I've been real busy this week. Mon and Tues were spent in the lab till 8-ish with the gang. Wed was the usual hectic FYP day and stayed in school till 6-ish I guess? Thurs was err studying for Auto flight systems UT in the library till 7-ish. School just sucked so much. Today I made it home in record time. Like, 7pm? Hahahaha.

Don't ask me about the UT, I'd tell you it sucked so badly that I almost killed myself. :(

Got to finish up the report tomorrow. I'm going to do my slides for presentation tonight. That is if I'm not tired. Hahaha. I slept at like 1am and woke at 7am? How sad my life is. Sigh. Count down to end of UT - 1 out of 12 done. Count down to end of semester - 5 weeks out of 15 weeks done.

Maybe I should write up a To-Do list for this weekend. I think I've got a lot of stuffs to be done. And yes, the damn report. Wish me luck for my FYP presentation part 1 next week. Very soon, I'll turn into a mad woman barking at any people who crossed my line. I mean, don't provoke a woman who is irritable now.

Goodnight folks. Love you all. XOXO. :)